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"When I stepped out into the bright sunlight of the dark movie house, I had two things on my mind: Paul Newman and a ride home..."

"Stay Gold Ponyboy, Stay Gold!"

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Spice Up Your Life! Pony Edition

I Slept Over At Brooks House, Shhh Johnny Doesn't Know That :p So We Did What Any Average Teenager Does And Pulls An All Nighter. We Did All The Normal Jazz. Watched Movies, Almost Start The House On Fire Making Popcorn, Draw A Penis On Johnny's Face While He Was Sleeping.... Around 7:30 We Got Bored And Woke Up Dawn Seeing If She Had Any Wonderful Ideas To Do. We Screamed "THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!" She Woke Up Pretty Fast And Ran Outside. She Got Pretty Mad When We Told Her It Was A Joke. But She Stayed Up With Us Anyways. She Reminded Brook And I That When Johnny Woke Up And Saw Me Here He'd Automatically Know I Slept Over, So We Came Up With A Plan. We'd Do The Most Annoying Thing Ever To Wake Him Up And He Will Be So Angry That We Annoyed Him He Wont Notice I Was There :) Good Plan? So We Blasted The Radio, Luckly It Was Spice Girls. "Just Kill Me Now!" Dawn Semi Yelled
Johnny Ran In Blazing Mad. Johnny Loveeees The Spice Girls,(He Denys His Love For Them Though), He Was Mostly Mad We Didn't Invite Him To Sing With Us. He Gave Us A Death Glare And Was About To Start Yelling When Brook Said "Hey Johnny!" Smiling All Innocently "Its Like 9 Why Are You Up?" Dawn Said. "Yeah It's Febuary Break!" I Laughed
He Was About To Reply When The Radio, Which Was Still Blasting,Said "Are You A Male In Love With Britney Spears?" "HELL YES!" I Replied "How About Hilary Duff?" "Yes" Johnny Said All Dreamly Like All His Anger Disappeared "You Wanna See Them Together In Concert, In Toronto, Ontario?! Well Here's Your Chance! Come To Our Studio Dressed Up As Your Favorite Diva, Brit Or Hilary, And You Can Win All Expense Paid Trip To See Them."
Johnny And I Looked At Each Other And In Sync Said "We Gotta Do This, Man!"
We Went Through All Our Sister's Clothes And Found Nothing, But We Borrowed Their Bra's. Kitty's Was So Tiny Compared To Britney, That I Had To Stuff And Double Up On Bra's Just To Get Close. I Guess This Ment We Had To Channel Our Inner Diva And
Shopping! :(
We Were All Glamed Up I Was Exactly 5'6, Britney Is 5'6.25, So I Wore Like Fake High Heels, But Man They Were Hard To Walk In. We Kept Falling Trying To Get To The Door Of The Station. There Were About 100 Hundred Guys There, Probably More. We Looked At The Comp. But We Didn't See Anyone Too Threatening. We Waited Till The Judges Came By And Said Pose. I Yelled "It's Britney, Bitch" And Johnny Said Some Quote From Lizzie Mcguire. They Smiled.
They Announced The Four Finalists, Johnny J. Cade As Hilary Duff, Ponyboy M. Curtis As Britney Spears, Jake L Harwas As Hilary Duff, And Paul S Mitchell As Britney Spears.
They Took A Video Of Us For The Website And Then Announced The Winners.....
And The Winners Are!
Jake And Paul! They Screamed, Very Girlish And Claimed Their Tickets. We Walked Off Slowly And Ended Up Tripping Again When They Stopped Us.
"You Two Are Also Winners!" The Radio Man Said
We Quickly Got Up "WE ARE!" :D
"Yup! Hope You Like The Wiggles" He Said Handing Us 2 Tickets To The Wiggles Show In Canada The Night Before The Hilary And Brit Concert. We Were Still A Little Sad, But We Got Over It.
"At Least I Can Get My Mashed Potato And My Fruit Salad Dance On" I Laughed.
We Stole Some Money From Darry For The Hotel And Gas But We Still Need Some For Food. So We Turned On The Radio Which Was Playing Non-stop Brit And Hilary For The Whole Hour And Thought.
"We Can Sell Everything Steve Owns?" Johnny Said Throwing Out An Idea
"Nah He Doesn't Own Much And The Things That He Does Is A Piece Of Crap. Why Do You Think He Hangs At Our House So Much?"
Then The Radio, Which Must Of Been Made In Heaven Stopped For One Commercial. "Hey You!" "Me Or Johnny" I Replied "Yes, You!" "Well That Didn't Really Answer My Question..." "We You And Your Friends Better Get Your Butts Down To Main St Where The New Taco Bell Is Opening Up. There Will Be Games And Prizes. Sign Up For The Tag Team Taco Eating Contest, You Can Win 50,000-" The Batteries Died At That Point But We Heard All We Needed. It Was 3:56, So We Skipped Getting All Our Friends Part And Ran Down The Street Towards Main Street To Sign Up.

"Making Money The Best Way We Know How, Eating!" Johnny Said Laughing While Entering Taco Bell. First Round They Brought Out 20 Tacos. Seemed Pretty Easy. 10 Tacos Per Person. Surprisingly The Only Teams To Make It To Round Two Were, PB&J (Us) And FattyMcFatterR'Us (I Couldn't Remember There Actual Name But Thats What They Looked Like) So Next Round Was A Speed Eating Contest. 20 Tacos. Who Eats Em' Faster Wins. It Was A Tough Race, But Im Pretty Positive They Cheated Cause They Won. Johnny And I Were So Bummed From Losing. The Fat Guys Stood Next To A Guy In A Blue Suit. And The Winner Is...Just Then One Of That Fat Guys Puked. All Over The Guy In The Blue Suit. "Not You" Said The Man. Team PB&J Please Go To The Counter. Your Our New Winners. Yeah We Ran To The Counter Only To Find Out We Didn't Win Actual Money, But Taco Bucks. Ehh Well I Guess All We Need Was Food Money....
So Then We Went To The Wiggles Concert. It Was Uber Fun. You'll Never Guess Who Me Johnny Saw. We'll Mostly ME. (Well You Can Probably Guess If You Read Johnny's Post You Probably Could...) Anyways Were Just Dancing Around When We Hear This Kid Crying. I Look Down And See Jayden James Spears. HOLY FRIED PEANUTS! I Ran Over And Gave Him A Hug And Screamed "WHERE IS YOUR MOTHER?!"
"I Dunno" He Said In His Sad Voice. Just Then A Mexican Cop Came By And Said "Is There A Problem Here, Son?" Just As I Was About To Say We Gotta Find Brit Brit. My Britney Senses Started Tingling! I Grabbed The Boy And Ran To The Majestic Voice Known As Britney Spears Calling For Her Son Jeydon. Britney Thanks Us, But Mostly Me Cause Me And Brit Are Tight ;) And Gave Us Front Row Tickets To Her Concert.

Can You Say.....This Will Be Continued.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Sugar We're Going Down Swinging

It Was Like A Scene Out Of The Movie. The Bridge Was Decorated In Christmas Lights And Was Covered In Light, Fluffy Snow. We Were Directly Under A Lamp Post. You Could Slightly See The Stars. It Was Perfect.
I Got Down On One Knee, And Pulled A Petite Box Out Of My Pocket.

Now That I Got Your Attention, Hopefully, I'll Start This Story On December 25 2011.

"Pony! You Have Been Laying On The Floor For 2 Days Now. Get Up!" Darrel Growled After He Tripped Over Me 5 Too Many Times. "Why Should I?" I Groaned "I Have Nothing To Live For." I Was Laying Between The TV And The Door Because That's Exactly Where I Fell When I Heard The Horrible News. Yes Everyone, Britney Spears Engaged.
"Pony," Darrel Said Sternly "It's Christmas. Get The Fuck Up. Open Your Presents And Eat Something." I Frowned But Got Up. Free Gifts, I Couldn't Give That Up!
"What Did You Get Brooks?" Darrel Ask, Trying To Read The Newspaper. "I'm Not Sure Yet." I Replied Dryly. I've Been Searching Since Thanksgiving For The Perfect Gift, But Nothing Seemed Good Enough. It Was Our First Christmas Together....As A Couple. You Can Call Me A Faggot As Much As You Want For Saying This, But I Wanted It To Be Perfect. I Don't Want It To Be Our Last.
Darrel Put Down His Coffee Mug. "Pony! All The Stores Are Close Now!" Thanks For Pointing Out The Obvious. "I'll Figure Out Something."
Soon The Curtis House Was Full Of People. The Whole Gang And Some Of The Shepards. Johnny Happened To Be My Favorite At The Time, Mostly Because Of The Present He Bought Me, The Britney Spears Live In Las Vegas DVD. I Died. Then Came Back To Life Shortly After. It Was Pretty Epic.
Then, I Ate A Pie. It Was Delicious. It Was Covered In Candy Canes And Whipped Cream. Pure Tastyness.
Then Out Of The Corner Of My Eye, My Face Covered In Whipped Cream, I Saw The Prettiest Thing In The Whole Wide World, Brooklyn Cade. "Wou Wook Weal Wretty Wo Way." I Managed To Mumble Out My Mouth Full Of The Amazingness That Is Pie. "What?" She Said Looking At Me All Confused. I Swallowed. "You Look Real Pretty Today" I Repeated Then Gave Her A Kiss. "You Taste Like Pie." She Half Laughed Then Pulled Out Present From Behind Her Back. "It's Just A Little Something."
I Ripped Apart The Red And Green Wrapping Paper To Reveal A Tiny Box. I Opened It. Inside Was The Best Present ANYONE Could Of Ever Given Me. It Was A Switchblade. Not Just Anyone Though. A Custom One With A Photo Of Britney Spears And I On It. "This...Is..." I Couldn't Even Think Of A Word To Describe How I Felt. "I Love You Brookie." She Smiled With Pleasure Knowing I Absolutely Adored Her Present. "What Did You Get Me?" She Asked. I Thought. Should I Lie? No. Truth. Girls Like The Truth, Or At Least That's What They Say. "I, Uhh, I Didn't Know What To Buy You." I Said Kind Of Quietly. She Jumped Off My Lap "What?" I Blabbed For A Bit About How I Just Didn't Know What To Get Her, Nothing Seemed Good Enough For Her. "We'll Pony, You Could Of At Least Got Me Something. Anything. Even Like Hair Grease." She Said "Something To Show Me You Tried." She Was Right I Thought. I Had No Good Argument Against That. She Kinda Stormed Out To Talk Jamie.
After A Few Minutes Johnny Came To Talk To Me. "Didn't Buy Brook Something, Huh?"
I Did A Man Grunt Meaning Yes. "We'll Hurry Up, Make Her Painting Or Something. It's What I Did For Angela." "Nah Man," I Thought Out Loud, "I Gotta Do Something Really Good. Something Directly From The Heart....I GOT IT" I Told Johnny My Secret Plan, The Best Present.
I Was Setting Up The Last Christmas Lights Around The Pole And Slipped On Some Black Ice. I Felt Horrible Pain Running Through My Left Leg. I Took Out My Phone From My Pocket And Called Brookie. "Brook." I Said Painfully "I'm Really Hurt Can You And Johnny Come Out Goldpost Lane?" She Sounded Really Worry And Said She'd Be There Soon.
She Ran Up. Johnny Trailing Behind Her. "PONY! What's Wrong? What Happened?" I
"Smiled And Stood Up Off The Ground "Nothing. Im Perfectly Fine." She Looked At Me Confused Then Hit Me, "What The Hell Is Wrong With You?!"
"Merry Christmas!" I Yelled The Kissed Her. She Looked Confused Again,"Wait Did You Decorate All Of This For Me?" I Nodded. "Not Just That...."
It Was Like A Scene Out Of The Movie. The Bridge Was Decorated In Christmas Lights And Was Covered In Light, Fluffy Snow. We Were Directly Under A Lamp Post. You Could Slightly See The Stars. It Was Perfect.
I Got Down On One Knee, And Pulled A Petite Box Out Of My Pocket. I Opened The Box Showing Absolutely Nothing.
"Brooklyn Cookie Cade, Will You Marry Me?" I Was Becoming All Sweaty And Nervous Like Everyone Says Happeneds. Is This How Soda Was? "I Know It Was Empty. But All The Jewelry Stores Were Closed And I Really Wanted To Do This. Today."
"Pony....I Dont Know What To Say!" She Said Twirling Her Hair.
"Say Yes." I Laughed Nervously.
"Yeaah Boy! Get Someee!" Johnny Yelled With A Video Camera In His Hand.
"Ponyboy, you're Only 17 And I'm 16...."
"So, I Love You. Isn't That What Counts?" I Said
"Yes, But?"
"But What You Don't Love Me?"
"I Do Love You!" She Paused. "Okay, I-"